Finding Inspiration In The Oddest of Places

The Morning News link to an ad agency site that has a page dedicated to the bad cover letters that they've received. It's mostly cringe-worthy:

"Strong writing abilities. Able to analysis data and problem solve."

And sometimes funny:

"I am seeking a new position as i have recently been laid."

But somewhere in there I found the perfect name for my first solo album:

"I am getting to my goal, slowly but surly."

Slowy But Surly, the new album by Shinbone available only in my fevered imagination.

Pics From The Gig

Here's a couple of pictures taken during my recent first gig down at the Irish Pub, I should have even more soon. I'll have to put them on Flickr or something, but till then:


I manfully try and keep at least one member of the audience distracted while the band agree on what instruments to play.

There's no picture where what I'm doing totally matches my T-Shirt, but this is quite close and I think it's got a lot of energy...

Smoking Pot Is Safe Says Ad

At least according to this article in Slate. What made me laugh was the link to an earlier Slate article saying:

Finally, an admission that using pot isn't necessarily calamitous. It's possible we're seeing this about-face only because previous scare-tactic ads were recently proved to increase drug use.

Hilarious.

I know what they mean. Not the drugs thing, but there have been a few recent road safety ads that were entertaining for quite the wrong reasons. There's that that looks like it's done on a camera-phone where Wham! some kid just gets taken out by passing traffic, it's like the "Bus Hit" from Final Destination or something. Then there was the speeding in urban areas (or possible drunk driving, I'm not entirely sure) one where the car comes off the road, flys over a fence and Boom! some random kid, who was just standing in the garden, splashed all over the grass.

I'm sure my enjoyment of those two are some kind of damning indictment of me or my taste or the deading effect of watching too many violent images on TV, but, damn, they do give you a jolt. Of course it would be a tragedy if it happen to any child in real life, but then so would any violence you see on TV.

We'll Just Carry On Referring To Them As Convicts Then

Apparently Cricket is trying to crack down on racism, Australia Cricket, though, are still fine with calling the English "Poms"

However, while backing the new clampdown on racism, Cricket Australia have admitted that they will not stop using the term "pom" having taken advice from the Australian Human Rights and Equal Opportunities Commission.

The commission has ruled that "pom was not hurtful when used in isolation, although using the word with others could be deemed racist, offensive or humiliating".

The English, of course, are hesistent to mention this lest "whingeing" gets added to the front of it.

Really Should Get Out More

I rented Munich and Final Destination 2 on DVD over the weekend (2 because I'd watched 3 the previous week and found it surprisingly enjoyable in a totally mindless way and was curious about the series).

About half way thorough Munich it occured to me that they both had the same plot. Horrible tragedy happens in which some parties escape, those survivors spend the rest of the movie being killed in a range of inventive ways and being paranoid about it.

It made it very difficult to take Munich seriously after that, even after I'd watched Spielberg's introduction where he made it very clear that it's a serious movie indeed.

A Guide To Not Getting Your Freak On

In response to yet another school banning dancing, which as George Bernard Shaw had it is the vertical expression of a horizontal desire legalized by music, when said dancing involves anything remotely sexual, Junichi has a set of rules to follow for everyone who wants to boogie on down without scaring the old folks, here's a couple:

1. Do not shake your body down to the ground, shake your booty, shake your rump, shake your thang, shake your bon bon, shake your moneymaker, or shake it like a saltshaker.
5. Step back if you are dancing kinda close and you feel a little poke coming through.
7. Do not use your lovely lady lumps to mix your milk with another person's cocoa puff or in any way create a milky, milky, cocoa puff-like substance.

Wise words indeed.

Compelling

Bill Clinton defends his record on terror. Vigorously.

A transcript for those without immediate access to the video.

He's Always There To Help Us Out Of The Little Jams Too!

Yes, it must be Tom Waits Day or something, anyway, The House Next Door Take a close look at the credit sequence for The Wire, which features various different artists doing Tom's Way Down In The Hole, including Tom himself.

It is no surprise, then, that The Wire's opening credits are not an ordinary credits sequence, but a series of four short films that distill each season's themes, goals, and motifs. On most TV dramas the credits sequence is little more than a contractual pecking order with flashy graphics and catchy music -- examples of what job-hunting production houses would call a "sizzle reel." Even the credit sequences on HBO's other programming, which are always evocative and given a full minute to breathe, usually seem detached from the shows themselves, to the point where they work as stand-alone mood pieces. But The Wire's four credits sequences don't fit any of these descriptors; the images are taken out of context from the season's individual episodes and arranged in a pattern that only makes sense if you watch the show closely. The content changes significantly from season to season, yet each credits sequence adheres to the same basic editing rhythms and visual schemes. The theme music is always Tom Waits' "Way Down in the Hole," but each season it's performed by a different artist from a different genre. Working in concert, the audio and the visuals create a 90-second mini-narrative that alludes to each season's victims and assailants, its legal and political strategies, its criminal schemes, its surveillance devices, and its instruments of death. The entire assemblage is scored to a mournful biblical cautionary tale about the necessity and difficulty of resisting temptation and sin.

By the way, the title of this post is a reference to the Big Time version of WDitH, what I didn't realise until recently is that it's the punchline to a story that was cut out of the CD:

Part of original verse deleted: "Have mercy… People, when I was on my way to this speech tonight, we pulled down in Dallas/ Texas. The lord loooves Dallas/ Texas. Well people, I mean to tell you the lord was working his wonders with his paint brush. All the many hues of his pallet. The almond, the many violets and the vermilion. And I was seated in Clipper Class. People I love Clipper Class! But I was seated next to and elderly Indian gentleman who was having some trouble with the tiny foil top that locks in the freshness on his strawberry preserves container. A problem we've all experienced from time to time… People I want you to know that he busted that top, till I thought he would die. And you know what I did!? You know what I did!? Well I tell you what I did! People I snatched the container from his hand, I tore open the foil top and I spread his preserves out on his toast for him! (applause)."

It's also interesting to read the debunking of the "Pregnant without intercourse" story in the notes at the bottom of that page. Dry and utterly humourless, but interesting never-the-less.

Free Tom Waits

Tom's releasing an album called Orphans soon. It's off-cuts and B-sides and stuff he found in his closet or something like that. Sounds interesting, it's spread over 3 CDs called Brawlers, Bawlers and Bastards respectively.

At the center of this record is my voice. I try my best to chug, stomp, weep, whisper, moan, wheeze, scat, blurt, rage, whine, and seduce. With my voice, I can sound like a girl, the boogieman, a Theremin, a cherry bomb, a clown, a doctor, a murderer…I can be tribal. Ironic. Or disturbed. My voice is really my instrument.

His record label, Anti, have made "Bottom Of The World" from the Brawlers CD available to download, which is jolly good of them.

Via the newly redesigned Glorious Noise who have plenty of links to other free Mp3s.

Something Fun

Over at Bad Science, Ben Goldacre has a couple of fun videos. First is the famous "Powers of Ten" video as recently parodied by The Simpsons. The second video on the page is some strange donkey like walking machine that's quite hypnotic.

As a bonus, that diet coke and mentos thing that was going around a while a go.